inicio mail me! sindicaci;ón

Friday May 23, 2003 at 06:33 pm

Dear Friend,

// Begin Installation #2:

So here I am in a hospital, in this weird gown that doesn’t cover my backside very well. A doctor keeps asking me questions… I keep telling her I don’t remember a thing, which is for the most part, true.

I’ve always been a really good boy. I’m a law abiding citizen, I don’t drive fast on the highway, and I don’t even like to swear. But… there’s something about drugs and some things illegal that has always been alluring to me. Maybe it’s the danger involved. Maybe it’s the complete freedom, the scintillating feel of adrenaline rushing through my veins as I do something that excites me yet sedates me at the same time.

Maybe it’s the escape.

It’s been a blur, really, these past few days. I wouldn’t say that I’m as crazy as Johnny Depp’s character from that one movie… What was it? Fear and Loathing in LV… No, not as crazy as that… I mean, I never saw any devils, or went out of my mind or anything. It’s not like I’m some kind of druggie or anything. I just don’t remember anything that happened.

I think my last clear memory was when I was just starting to go up when a friend at the party offered a me a few bumps.

Of course, I accepted. Who wouldn’t? It was free!

Have you ever imagined yourself in a world made of plastic? Everything is super shiny, super defined. Your arms, hard to move, your eyes — strangely spastic. And sweaty. Sticky. Everything so very slippery and hot. Yes, a world of plastic that melted into a sea of human flesh rubbing up against itself.

Claustrophobia. Somehow I found myself in open air only to be accosted by the strangly sweet and inviting smell of cigarettes, cloves and marijuana all mixed together. I must have looked pretty bad (or good, perhaps?) because next thing I knew I was sitting down and someone was offering me a puff of something.

Of course, I accepted. It would have been rude push the person away.

Now, after this is when I saw her. At this point, I don’t even remember what she looked like. All I remember was that she was beautiful beyond comprehension.

Blankness, and somehow we were at her house. It was like I was on TV and suddenly the scene changed. Who knew? Groping, grabbing, heat, and lots of snorting is what I remember. Lines. More lines. Where was I again? Another line. What was my name? Just one more time, for old time’s sake. I swear I remember her from somewhere. Oh yeah! The club.

Next, the ATM. More money. More sacks, more lines, more little pills, more fungus, more powder, more bottles. Who knows what day it is at this point. As a true supporter of capitalism, I want to consume! You can’t blame me for that, can you? I’m just working with the system that this country thrives upon!

Binge. Consume. Ingest. There aren’t enough words to express… the feeling of utter gluttony of the mind. I became fascinated with a light. It was as if I was in slow motion. I tried to catch it, this ephemeral dream of a light. And then I knew darkness.

—-

And that’s how I ended up here, in the hospital, in this weird gown that doesn’t cover my backside very well. The doctor keeps asking me questions… I keep telling her I don’t remember a thing, which is for the most part, true.

It’s all been a blur, really.

// End Installation #2

Love,
Me.

yerbabygirl said,

May 26, 2003 @ 1:23 pm

kim…
.. hi.
ive arrived here through madpimp.com…  i know that you dont know me.. but i just want to say that i love your writing.. i’ve been visiting madpimp for a little over a year now..
i’m just.. i guess.. grateful that such a talented mind like yours has been online.. i love reading your work (i’m redundant, yeah)
so there. 2 eprops and my feelings..

JO21717E said,

May 27, 2003 @ 3:49 pm

hi kim, its joanne. hope you’re doing well!! take cares.

NoBackstreetboys said,

May 29, 2003 @ 10:31 pm

I don’t get it…

dhdh49 said,

June 10, 2003 @ 5:28 pm

hey, i didn’t know you had a xanga. :D
btw, do you update the journal on your site and here? :o

ElmerMM said,

June 13, 2003 @ 12:01 am

shi yer hot!!! very nice picture

ElmerMM said,

June 13, 2003 @ 12:08 am

Ohhh you are a guy, my bad, I assumed u were the chick on the profile pic

shi said,

June 19, 2003 @ 10:15 pm

I’m a girl…

Sup007 said,

June 22, 2003 @ 3:04 pm

My girl Kim has some mad skillz. So when does the next installment come in?

Sup007 said,

July 22, 2003 @ 10:34 pm

Update!!! Update!!! Update!!! =)

bjtdevera said,

November 29, 2003 @ 8:39 am

The next installment should be about a guy with a hairy butt who yells out “Nagoo Nahoo Cahoo!”

twistedpanda said,

March 17, 2004 @ 5:50 pm

can you write lyrics for ballads?

Sup007 said,

April 29, 2004 @ 12:39 pm

What the hell happend to Installment #3?

wutai012 said,

June 9, 2004 @ 12:38 am

that was hella dope..  Took me back to my party days….  :)

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