Sigh… I haven’t blogged here lately

And the minute I started, it became so addicting. Even more addicting than AIM. Anyhow!! I went to the TET festival today, for the Lunar New Year… It was awesome… I got soo much free stuff!! =D A looot of condoms and lubricant and stuff. HAhahaha but I’m giving those to my brother. Happy new year bro! here’s some condoms. AHHAA what a present! ^_^* They’re Gold Durex kind, too.

I felt really lonely, though… Like… super lonley… I don’t know whether it’s just because I’m especially emotional right now… (time of month).. or what.. but at one point I was brought to tears… I mean.. My mom left me alone and went off with her friend for a while… So I was just drifting around the fairgrounds alone.. And like… I would stop at the game venders to watch people do things and stuff.. and it was like.. Everyone was in a group… and having fun… I mean… I think I got some inviting looks, from a couple guys… But.. eh…I didn’t feel like taking the initiative like I usually do. (Usually when I find myself in that type of situation i’ll just introduce myself to someone who looks nice and have fun w/them the whole day)…. But I don’t know what was different today…

And then.. the game venders kept asking me to try the games… But I didn’t really feel like playing.. Just like watching people play. They kept asking me whether or not i had a boyfriend… I think it was because usually the guys play to win things for girls… Aish.. And then some of them even just automatically assumed i have one.. I got a lot of “Go grab your boyfriend over here and get him to win you something!”… That made me feel soooo bad for some reason.. even though I know they didn’t mean to hurt my feelings.

Gah… Why am I so insecure? I don’t know… But I hate the insecure feeling! It’s so.. demeaning. :T Narf.