Some people have mentioned that I have a cloud of sadness that follows me around — a cloud that momentarily takes over my face as certain subjects are brought up. It’s weird — I always thought that I was good at hiding my emotions.

I’ve always been one of those people that’s happy-go-lucky. I try to let nothing phaze me and keep myself happy. Inside, though… It can be a different story. Sometimes the case is — the bigger I smile, the louder I talk the more nervous and shitty I’m feeling. About the things around me and about myself.

It’s hard being an insecure teenager prone to self-introspection that’s deeper than it really is. I think if I took my life at a purely surface value I would have a lot more happiness. I’d never try to analyze my own feelings and therefore never have to worry about preventing other people from feeling the way I do.

I’d love to break away
To a place where
People can say
Hi there
Without inhibition
I’d like to hold your hand
And grasp your soul
To make you understand
That friendship has no toll
Outside of fiction
I want to be free
Far from all of this
Far away from me
Gesso the canvas
Put the keys in the ignition
I’d like to drive away
Start anew
Where everything is okay
Lots to do

… and … im out of inspiration.