I always think, “I can do that…”
But if that’s the case, then, why haven’t I done it?

After reading a great book, I always think, “I could do this, I could write a book.”

After eating a great dish at a restaurant I think, “This would be easy to cook”

When I see clothes I like, knit items that are cute, most crafty things, I think … “I could make that.”

And it’s true. I’ve written a novella length story, so I know I
could do more. I cook great dishes all the time. I
even make my own clothes sometimes, and knit. Once I wanted to
make a print for a shirt, so I learned how to create stencils and roll
paint I did it.

I bake cookies and cakes. I even learned how to decorate cakes the way you see them do it on TV.

… But I’ve never, ever, through all my half-hearted trying, been able to hit the type of quality that I seek within myself.

From myself I expected the next great American novel.

I expected to surpass the Iron Chefs on my first try.

I want to make clothes people only dream of.

I want to make cakes and bake cookies the way they do on Food Network challenges.

I want to knit things that make publishers scramble to have the rights to the patterns.

…And when I’m working feverishly on whatever it is I may be obsessed
with at the time… I think, yes, this might be my calling..I might be
able to become an expert at this!…. I lose interest and move onto
something new.

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How do people get that spark, that
resolve that makes them work so hard at one thing and become so amazing
at one thing that everyone acknowledges their talent? Where does
it come from… and how do I get it for myself?

On another note… I just started writing the next Great American Novel, so y’all better watch yourselves.