I’m weirded out by the fact that I can be happy. I’m weirded out by the fact that I can be okay, not sad, not obsessed with my impending insanity — or death. It freaks me out that I feel like I’m possibly okay. That I might become my old self again. That I might be happy again.
Bleh. 
i know exactly how you feel, kim.
i used to be like you; well not exactly like you, but close enough. i am always on the lookout for some little moment of happiness, but that moment never comes. over time, that moment gets farther and farther away. kind of like the light at the end of the tunnel. i for one do not wish to become my old, cheerful self again. i like the dark and brooding image that i portray to others. although that longing is still there, i don’t expect it to come any time soon. so, i will just wait for it, and wait some more, until i die of age or whatever in my quest for that one shining moment in time.
bleh, as well
p.s.: i almost forgot, how are you coming on your tutting? i still haven’t found anyone here in dallas to learn from. oh well, just gotta try harder.
till next time.
heehee havent gotten very far… but if you want to learn tutting IM hayato619 and ask him for his tutting vid.
Tell him I sent you.
i think i might have spoken to him once, but that is in the past, now. thanks for your input. my appreciation is eternal.
YAY!!!
hihi
Could you help me? You have so much webdesign experiance. How much do you charge? And how do you go about finding clients? I’m trying to set up my portfolio
Thanks
~~Babybee
hey pariah, if you want to learn tutting, it’s a form of popping, which you can find out about in http://www.shaddupanddance.com
you can go to mrwiggleshiphop.net i think to see videos of awesome poppers who can wreck it.
to baby blue bee, you get paid according to how well you market yourself and how good you are. in the dot.com heydays, you could conceivably get paid 10k for a flash website. nowadays, you’ll be lucky to find a project.
in any case, develop a portfolio first. do websites for your relative’s businesses. find connections. make friends online. do websites for free. if you have a badass portfolio, then you can sign up for a job via monster.com or other job sites, or do contract bids on places like guru.com and elance.com
thanks dave
thanks dave. the only prob is that the site doesn’t work though. i checked out mr wiggles, and his shit is the best. i think i have found my new hobby, er way of life.
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