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I’m scared

June 27, 2001 at 7:04 am · Filed under Rigamarole

I’m scared about going to Anime Expo with Jason. I’m scared about meeting him again. What if meeting him again this time is the same with every time I’ve met him during this past year… Falling more deeply into infatuation each time. Feeling regretful each time… Feeling things so strongly that I think that they shouldn’t be reserved for one human being alone.

What if I hurt Jason, what then. What if I gain the hatred of all his friends… His friends that have been so nice to me and let me into their world so easily. What if I hurt Jason?

Then, what if I don’t feel the same… What do I do? It’s never happened before… How will I know how to react? Patrick says I think too much. Maybe I do. I can’t help it. I even think in my sleep. I guess that’s why I never quite feel refreshed when I wake up. I’m tired of thinking.

I’m tired of worrying. I’m tired of my life. (Except for Katie… Because she’s perfect… :P I love you Katie.)

Vinh said,

June 27, 2001 @ 9:12 am

Too dramatic. Go, have fun, and
don’t think so much.

If you want to make that thinking
worse:

If Jason and his friends are nice
to you, for what reason would you
hate them? Because they make it
difficult for you to feel the way
you do? Put those aside. It
sounds to me you guys have had an
awkard situation… if you let it
get in the way, what’s to stop it
from getting in the way everytime
you meet? This is getting pretty
personal. Blogs are great for
expressing yourself, but be careful
of how much you say because when
you start naming people, the issues
become personal to not only you,
but also to the people you name.
Discuss this with Jason,
communication is very important.

Kim said,

June 27, 2001 @ 12:12 pm

No, not me hating them. Them hating me. That’s what I’m afraid of. :T Yeah, I do tend to be rather melodramatic at times. Think this is bad? Try being in my head. OHOHOHO.

Love
Kim.

Vinh said,

June 27, 2001 @ 2:51 pm

Ah… you don’t have to worry about
them hating you. I think I have
an idea of the people Jason hangs
out with and they’re nice guys.
No worries.

=) I think girls your age these
days tend to be melodramatic.
That’s fine. My lil’ sis is like
that too.

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