So, yet again I’ve ffed up my life. That’s the second time in two weeks. A new record for even me. What happened you might ask? Let me tell you what the fuck happened…

So, you know how in the ‘status’ section, I decided to stop pining after Nick and try looking at other guys?… I guess for me it doesn’t happen that way. Maybe I was trying too hard, I don’t know… But anyhow.

While watching cowboy bebop (narf. the irony, the irony), making out and whatnot began to happen. With a guy that was not Nick. Strangely, it was the first guy I’ve voluntarily kissed (bleh. No i don’t count that one other time) since the first time I kissed Nick in september.

Now, it wouldn’t have been such a big deal. If my mother had not found me. With his hand under my shirt. Ohh woe to me. My life just ended right there I believe.

Its great, isn’t it. So yeah. That failed miserably. And now I feel like I’m some kind of whore/slut/hooker shit. I don’t know. I just feel like I want to talk to Nick. He always makes me feel better. But maybe he can’t this time.

God. I’m such a stupid bitch.