This entry was auto-mirrored from MovableType to Xanga

Background

I’m going to break my silent vow and write directly to and for anyone who may be reading this. This is less for myself as a reflection than an explanation of my motives for writing and why the writing is so few and far in between.

To those who have recently stumbled across my site, I apologize if I seem like an overly negative person. There was once a time that I could write about everything — even good things, and feel at ease about writing. Now, though, it feels as if every entry is tinged with some sort of sadness, malice, or other negatism.

In truth, most of the time I am a fairly upbeat [albeit offbeat] person.

However, several events have occured in my life which have caused me to associate online journals/blogs/personal sites with a feeling of wistful nostalgia. Thus fueling the negative tone behind my posts.

Why do I feel like I need to explain this? — I’m not sure.

I don’t want you [whoever you might be] to think that I am some constantly depressed, deranged, angry person.

Just sometimes.

Just when I write.

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With that said, I feel as if I should write about something cheery, something happy to prove that indeed, at times I can be happy. Which I will.

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I’ve never been a very romantic person, or never thought I was. Sure I’ve had the occasional wining and dining and flowers et al… But those things never seemed to work out as well, or never impressed me as much as someone giving me the last bite of a burger, or getting me a cheap plastic ring from a vending machine [one of my few romantic fantasies that, actually technically hasn’t come true yet].

I’ve come to just believe that I’m not the romantic type. Afterall, I burp and fart and cause trouble — anything but ladylike.

Of late, though, all of a sudden I feel as if I’ve been innundated with images [I say images, but I mean occurances of making memories, feelings, events] that have made me feel like everything in the background has disappeared and all is left are bubbles, sparkles and overly bright images. [anime lovers, agree]

Even things that seem totally mundane, like seeing a school play for class credit, become complete adventures complete with crashing free buffets, getting lost trying to find a bathroom, a romp through art galleries, some stealing of food, and funky ass music.

Random, but enough to make me smile even when just thinking about it.

And then it makes me realize, I am a romantic person. Along the lines of spontenaity, adventure, impromptu picnics and laughter that doesn’t end.

Silly adventures make me googly eyed.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.

Love,
Kim