Sometimes I amaze myself with the versatility of my talent for hurting myself. These past few weeks have been riddled with moments of intense clumsiness, embarassment and pain.

Clumsy Act #1: Last week I had a stay-over person (this means the person pretty much shadows me, a college student, for a day)… That seems normal enough, right? So why is it that I somehow found myself walking through Aldrich Park (the park in the middle of campus) in the middle of the night with my person’s boyfriend and her boyfriend’s host? Who knows… But it happened. Anyhow — so we’re walking through this park and suddenly I’m like “Ouch!”… Apparently a tree had bit me. Trust me — I know how it happened as little as you do! — damn, showering later that night was a pain.

Clumsy Act #2: Ahh… And then the other day I was running away from a friend because I was leaving a surprise at his door. Somehow I ended up hurting my shoulder because I rammed it into the doorknob. Yes. The doorknob. How my shoulder even GOT to the doorknob, I don’t even know.

Clumsy Acts #3: Alright, this is something that happens at least once a day. I THINK the door is slightly ajar. (Theres a door in my dorm that always looks kind of ajar… you’d think I’d learn by now that it’s closed…) Anyhow, every time I see this door, I’m like YES! It’s open! WOOO! Take a running leap and ram my entire weight into the door. Only to be pushed off easily. (The worst is when someone’s walking out at the same time.

Clumsy Act #4: So yesterday I was taking out the laundry. Harmless, no? I guess not for me! Somehow I dropped my laundry basket (which isn’t the basket kind, but the fold out kind with 4 legs and a bag int he middle) and somehow one of the legs lifted and broke one of my toenails. -.- How embarassing.

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I think I should copyright jumping up and down and howling in pain “WHYYYYY MEEE WHYYY MEEEE?!??!!”… >_