inicio mail me! sindicaci;ón


Where does keeping a distance and acting “real” cross the line with rudeness? Hyung touched this subject a while back and every once in a while it pops back in my mind in my interactions with people.

Is acting courteous, nice, or even friendly to somebody you dislike immensely really that bad? Why does it condemn you as “fake” when all you’re trying to do is keep negative feelings at a low?

Are people who are rude more “real” to themselves and others more than someone who is courteous? Why should a childish outlash of emotions be more respected than someone who can hide it?

I’m not saying that I hide my emotions (because that would be a complete lie), I just normally don’t choose to tell people the negative things I feel towards them unless they’re really close to me (because I want to get rid of those thoughts), or if i’m provoked.

It doesn’t seem worth it to tell someone how I feel.

Then too, is it too much for me to expect courtesy from people who dislike me? It seems I am giving them the benefit of the doubt — hoping that they really are kinder people than I expect in my mind. –Though it is a disappointment every time that doesn’t work out.

And so my discontentment towards life grows.

grant said,

January 2, 2003 @ 8:41 pm

i like your eyes.

Jon said,

January 3, 2003 @ 2:37 pm

You have touched on a subject that occurs in my thoughts at least once a day. Like a lot of things in life, social interactions and the line between being real and being rude is dynamic. To try to shoehorn them into black and white, where you are nice to people in this situation, and rude to others in another only causes frustration.

I always see life as a journey of balancing with the flow. Sometimes you gotta fight it, sometimes you gotta roll with it. As one of my friends reminded me when I was angry about a lot of things, he said: "Jon, you need to pick your battles."

Right now, friend of mine seems to be battling everything in the world and he sees nothing but negativity and is experiencing great frustration in his work, his social life and school. He takes everything far too seriously and is constantly fighting what doesn’t agree with him. The end result: he is losing motivation towards life.

I myself used to expect way too much from people. I learned quickly that dealing with people is a trickly balancing act. I try to be nice and courteous to everyone I meet… I know i fail sometimes when someone annoys the hell out of me… My disdain was probably pretty obvious at a meeting I had yesterday that included a certain individual who is so clueless about how to interact with people it is almost sad… However, I try to take a positive look at it and think of that person as practice or a test to improve my patience. I know he will not be the last of the annoying people I will encounter in my life and I think I handled him better than I would have 2-3 years ago.

In a nutshell, one just has to roll with the punches and appreciate the good people and good times when they come around. Life is a strange and wonderful game with rules that are constantly changing and constantly being broken. Life kicks my ass sometimes but unless it kills me, I move on and hope for the best.

Just my $0.02.


Jon said,

January 3, 2003 @ 2:39 pm

(forgot to add this in!)

By the way Kim, I love your layouts! Keep up the great work, it’s always a pleasure to view and read your page.


Loke said,

January 6, 2003 @ 11:27 pm

Hey Havent been here in a while so dont know if this is old news but…your layout is kikin ass KIM! well anyways…yeah i can come off as "Fake" and by ready what you were saying…i dont really feel to bad about it for once…you really helped me out…theres not really much of a point in showing hatred and disgust…just thought i’d thank you…so Thanx kim!

q said,

January 7, 2003 @ 12:10 pm

Good topic choice about being "courteous" or "fake"?
I just wanted to say you are not acting "fake" when you say hi even you dislike the other individual because there isn’t anything wrong being courteous. You may not like an individual but you have to treat the other person as person not as a beast.
Well, I just wanted to say happy new yr. Kim keep up the good work..
Oh yeah, how about sharing your thoughts on the controversial "abercrombie & fitch" t-shirts on the asian american culture….peace and take care

i74 said,

January 12, 2003 @ 8:24 pm

perhaps you would be happier if your weren’t worried about such trivial matters.

which is worse: being fake or passing judgement on others? a reasonable argument can be made for both, but why bother?

respectfully submitted,

RSS feed for comments on this post

Leave a Comment